Oh hey, what's up, I hate research.

I've come to find that my research strategy for journal articles is the same strategy I use at a Chinese buffet.

Everything looks good. Fill plate. Ingest as much as possible.

And then I find, in hindsight of course, that I've eaten too much. That my strategy of ooh, this looks so good, this looks exactly like what I need, PRINT PRINT PRINT just leads to a boatload of indigestion. Then I find (after reading the whole 20-page article, of course) that the article I thought was so amazing actually is research on retarded children. Or Korean children. Or ugly children. And I will have none of those in my classroom.

Then I get hungry and start all over again. Second plate. Pretty soon dessert. Oh, this looks so good, it just smells satisfying. Oh, turns out it's seven-hour-old squid with orange sauce.

Good thing I didn't notice until after I ate the whole thing.